What’s left unsaid
Posted by Carol Howard Merritt on 18 Nov 2008 at 11:28 am | Tagged as: church, pastors, technology, writing
A Pastor Friend was moving to Arizona for a job. He had multiple interviews with the church nominating committee, he preached for the congregation, he went through the excruciating congregational vote. Finally, he met with a clearance committee from his denomination.
A Pastor from the Committee said, “You have a blog.”
“Yes,” Pastor Friend answered.
“Well, that could be a problem,” Committee Pastor continued, “Some of your opinions are ‘out there.’ And you need to gain trust with your congregation. In order to do that, you really shouldn’t tell a congregation your opinion on anything for at least the first three years of your ministry.”
Please discuss.
I guess I should add that I read the blog regularly, and there is nothing that I’ve read that I would remotely describe as “out there.”
Did he still take the job and keep blogging? (Sorry, I just want to know how the story ends.)
Yes, on both accounts.
To be perfectly honest, this is the main reason why I don’t keep a blog. I’ve heard horror stories about people who didn’t get jobs (not just church jobs) because of blogs. As a seminarian I figure I can’t afford to have a public opinion that might get me in trouble in the future. But I’ll be interested to hear what others have to say.
I have had my blog about a year. Just recently I have started being “out there” with my opinions, heretical stuff like my support of Obama. Also some personal disclosures. Have I actually voiced my support for gay marriage yet? That’s coming. What is the result? I feel empowered! And at age 50, that is pretty great. At the same time, I understand the dynamic Carol is probing here, and if I were young and really needing a church (monetarily) or perhaps just needing a church to LOVE me (let’s be honest) it would be harder for me. But at this point in my life I have let go of many things and am willing to embrace the things that matter to me. My own voice is one of those things.
Some COM members (I assume it’s a PCUSA church) are just stupid. It’s like hearing stuff from anyone. You listen to what they say, ask whether it is wise and if it isn’t, throw it away. I would venture a guess that the person making the statement is over 60. (I blog and I’m over 60, but. . .) If I tried to follow what every COM member told me, I’d be in an insane asylum.
Don’t share any opinions until after 3 years of ministry? Yikes! How do they expect a pastor to be anything other than a caretaker of encrusted traditions?
Are there people who will be turned off by a church that has a pastor who blogs their own opinions? Yes.
Are there people who will be attracted to a church that has a pastor who blogs their own opinions? Yes.
I figure person #1 has plenty (the majority) of churches to choose from, so it makes sense that there are a few churches for person #2.
I know from experience that it can be taken as a negative. I’ve had conversations with a PNC (not recently
) in which a strongly held theological position was pulled from my online writings as a source of concern. As a pastor of a small congregation with a significant immigrant component, I have repeatedly blogged my opinions..from a theological and scriptural perspective…about justice for immigrants. Those opinions were raised by a PNC member as potentially too radical for the church in question. I don’t think that was ultimately a deciding factor for that PNC, but it was raised as a liability.
That said, I think we have to be able to take positions, and take them openly. If we are to be teaching elders, we are obligated to be public thinkers. If we step away from that duty out of fear for our advancement up the career ladder, we aren’t doing what we’ve been called to do.
I’ve been aware of, and more than a little concerned about, this phenomenon for some time now. But as I’ve been getting further and further from any paying church experience, looking for jobs without success, I found that keeping a blog was a way for me to keep my writing skills sharp(er), to continue to be theologically engaged, and even to engage in the limited kinds of ministry that the blogosphere makes possible (like encouraging folks to support groups like Kiva, or disaster relief, or so on).
In addition to some of what’s already been said, I have to say that while a pastor should be somewhat cautious not only about his/her opinions, but the manner in which they’re expressed. If a blog demonstrates an inflexible attitude in a pastor, or some unacceptably negative character trait like narcissism or sociopathy, a church would be wise to avoid hiring that pastor as a result.
But if a church is likely to avoid hiring me because I don’t align with them politically on every point? Well, I probably wouldn’t be comfortable in such a church for long, anyway….
Is it really possible for a pastor with no discernible opinions to preach for three years?
I can’t really imagine that.
This simultaneously reveals how silly it is for me to worry about my blog, and makes me worry about it even more.
:-\
This is an important warning. Hiring committees are notoriously fearful and often will reject a candidate just because one of their members has reservations. If you want to increase the possibilities for being hired, don’t disclose much and certainly don’t keep a blog.
Rule of thumb. If you are afraid of what your blog might do to your career, then don’t blog.
All that said, the church is full of fearful preachers who I think do a lot of damage because they are not open with their views. The more blogging preachers we have the better in turning our church around.
I wonder about the idea that withholding information/opinions builds trust. It’s usually my experience (with all sorts of relationships) that listening to one another builds trust.
I have blogged about little that was meaningful, so I’ll keep my comments to the sharing opinions arena.
I think we are called to share ideas and opinions and vision. That is why we are called. However, I do think we need to ask ourselves why we want to share our opinions. I have seen some people, overwhelmed by their desire to make an impact, share all their opinions immediately. Instead of impressing anybody, they have alienated everybody, and have really stepped in it before there was any trust.
It’s not an either/or situation. We don’t either share our opinions or we don’t. We have to listen, discern what is important to share and what can wait.
Yes, there are many PNC’s and COM’s that are not familiar with new technology and worry that if a candidate has a blog that automatically means they are an “activist” pastor and will offend members of the congregation, presbytery, or bring the church into ill repute. Hopefully that will change with time.
And Yes, there are some out there who feel that a pastor should just preach the Gospel and stay away from controversial topics. That probably won’t change with time. (And some of you may think pastors should stay away from controversy.)
But, having been the COM representative to several PNC’s I will say it is so much better to have those opinions out there. If it makes the PNC or congregation uncomfortable with you, so be it. God probably wasn’t calling you to that congregation to begin with. When the candidate is called by a church we would hope that they would be authentic (although still on “good behavior” for a few months to a year). The more information the better during the discernment process so everyone can better sense God’s leading. At least that is my opinion based upon experience, including the cases where a call goes bad quickly because each side did not do a good job of trying to understand the other ahead of time.
Now, should churches not have websites, podcasts or blogs (and I don’t mean the pastor’s blog) because it might scare off candidates?
The notion that I would have to hide who I really am in order to maintain a job for three years seems really dishonest to the congregation, and not true to myself. In shot, that would make me another one of the burnout statistics among young pastors. If people on a committee were to read my stuff (which is rarely without controversy to be sure) and could not trust me to love them to a place to receive God, then it would not be a place for me. Although, I wonder how many congregations there actually are who can honestly accommodate that way.
Over half of the PCUSA churches are below the 150 membership line (which usually means regular attendance of 20-60 or something close to that). Most people think in very black and white terms largely based on their environment. I am not confident that such creative tension is welcome in areas like that. Rather they are trying to get rid of tension altogether.
So it’s tough, but I would not be able to minister to a place where I had to keep my light under a bushel. Pretty sure that Jesus would not want me to either. Hiding any of my beliefs which I have worked hard to understand and continue to work hard to understand and improve would just be hiding myself and I have a moral problem with that. (Note that this is coming from the guy who was ready to circulate his PIF over 9 years ago and pulled back at the last second – this was one of the reasons).
[...] Church posted about a pastor-friend of hers who is moving to Arizona to accept a new call. She describes the situation thus: He had multiple interviews with the church nominating committee, he preached for the [...]
It’s best to think who our audience is. My blog is intended for reflection among friends. I don’t think anyone in the church family is aware of the blog.
I just did a search on my name, and my blog didn’t show up directly. However, it did show up on the Blog Roll of a friend – so I’ll ask that the blog roll entry be deleted. I let friends know my blog address, and they either bookmark it or subscribe to the feed. It’s not intended to make me popular, nor to get enough traffic to derive some revenue.
On the other hand, is a friend who does have a blog, and he uses it for ministry. The teens at his new congregation seem to especially love it – it’s a real positive for them. He posts links to all sorts of things, shares his opinions (including the election), why he voted a certain way, etc.
As a parent of three teenagers, I would think it great that a pastor would communicate in such a way that my teens were frequently checking out the posts and making comments on real-life theological matters.
I also follow the blog of a retired UMC pastor, continuing to serve a congregation, and he is not afraid to blog what he thinks. He changes the names to protect the guilty though.
In general, a blog that is mainly a single-issue, or a place to moan, are probably not a good idea to have up while circulating a PIF – especially if a PNC can do a search on your name and find the blog.
Ah…the question about blogging and ministry. I have always wondered if my blog (where I have enjoyed being provocative on more than one occasion) would come back to bite me throughout our wonderful ordination and call process…
Well, after basically being told I was pretty much going to get a job this past spring, I did NOT get the job, and it was all very specifically related to this post about Faith House Manhattan:
http://pomomusings.com/2008/05/08/faith-house-manhattan/
And while it sucked during the whole ordeal, it was MUCH better to figure that out during the process than a month or two into the position.
I’ve had my blog around for about 5 years now. If you google “Adam Walker Cleaveland” — well, I’m all over there. And you can find a lot of stuff (which is why I’ve decided to NOT run for President). But in the end – what both Sarah and I realized – was that this is the position I have put myself into, and frankly, I don’t want to work at a church where I can’t have this part of me be present. I like to blog. I like to have conversations and love to play the role of provocateur at times.
And if a church doesn’t want that – well, then it’s probably not the best place for me to be.
And the church I was interviewing to work at is not one that would have been a good match – and a single blog post helped to point that out.
I am with y’all. If I am asked to censor the voice I have been blessed with to “lead” a congregation I would rather not lead there.
I see this fear of prophetic conversations as a difficulty with any community seeking to live out the gospel.
I am not sure if my blog was a factor in me not receiving any job I was seeking. Perhaps…I am currently in a position that encourages me to blog and support me in exploring conversations that arise in this process.
I hope we can get over all of this and be real, vulnerable, and stop the bullshite.
I am sure there are some churches who would be fearful about pastors and blogs. As a person who has been reading blogs for a while (I have just started writing one)….there are some that are out there….but I think that is what we are called to do as pastors. We are called to challenge people from their comfortable pew.
Honestly if I took no hard stands in the first three years of ministry at a church, then I would never have accomplished anything. It is important to take stands on issues. Just make sure that whatever you take a stand on is something that you truly believe because you future may depend on it.
On the other hand, dear fellow pastors, we must remember that we are given a privileged voice in our congregations that most members do not receive, though most of them are as intelligent (more so?), as educated (more so?) and as experienced (more so?), and certainly as filled with God’s Spirit as we. Still, this congregation “authorizes” us to speak with a measure of “authority” in their midst. What a gift, and one to be cared for and honored! We should also humbly acknowledge that there are some in our ranks who love (crave?) this privilege so much that their “authentic voice” becomes idolatrous. Can we not see how this could be irritating to church members? We need to honor the fact that our congregations have granted us this privilege, and speak accordingly. This counts in the pulpit, at the coffee shop, and yes, in the blogosphere.
So, should we be surprised that our congregants *care* about what we write on blogs? Of course not–we have, in some sense, been authorized to speak to them AND on behalf of them.
So, should we censor ourselves or “not say what we really think”? Of course not–but we should speak humbly, recognizing that our pulpits (real and metaphorical) have been given to us by the churches we serve, and thus, we are in some measure accountable to those folks.
Maybe we can think of this not in terms of “job security vs. authenticity” but rather in terms of loving our neighbors and seeking not to put a stumbling block before our brothers and sisters? Controversy and provocation is not always a good thing! Even when we’re right, we can still be wrong.
“we have, in some sense, been authorized to speak to them AND on behalf of them.”
Hhmm…. that’s interesting. I wonder if this relationship changes from church to church.
I don’t think that my congregation necessarily sees me as speaking on behalf of them. We say a lot of things from the pulpit (even controversial things), and we encourage discussion and disagreement.
I certainly would never want to do or say anything to embarrass my congregation, but I don’t necessarily see myself as trying to represent them, nor would I encourage them to emulate my thoughts or opinions. Something else is happening in our congregation. It’s more that I (hopefully) challenge them and they challenge me….
Point taken, Carol. You’re certainly right that this dynamic changes from church to church. Still, I can’t help but think that if the Washington Post published a letter to the editor signed by you, as AP at your church, and this letter took a position that most of your congregation disagreed with, they would wince. And you might hear about it, since you represent them in some sense (like it or not). And that would be legitimate for them to do so.
My larger point is about the difference between “free” speech and wise, caring speech. They don’t have to be mutually exclusive.
I do think we need to be careful in what we blog about. I think we need to be really careful is we post anything specific about our own congregation. It is one thing to be authentic; it is another to be hurtful.
I don’t follow the blogs of all the people who have commented on this post, so my comments are not directed to anyone in particular.
If someone is a pastor of a 300 member church, then replacing names with initials doesn’t quite cover it. Imagine this pastor writes, “X brought up the windows again last night at our meeting. I wish he could just let go of the building and move on to discussing real ministry.” There is a good chance that people in that congregation would know exactly who “X” is. When we post things like this, we are doing the same thing we are constantly working against.
It is one thing to write about controversial issues, emerging worship, ordination standards, etc. It is another to write about our own congregations.
Whether it is blogs or facebook or myspace, I think anyone in the public eye has to pay attention to what is posted. Would you want a pastor, doctor, lawyer, teacher with an inappropriate picture as a profile picture? There are lots of universities and employers who are looking at the social networking pages to narrow candidate fields.
You have to know who might be viewing your pages. I have tried to remind myself not to post anything that I wouldn’t say to someone in person.
As a librarian (another field that blogs a lot) I have kept my personal blog private and anonymous, but now do have a “professional” presence. Ministry and librarianship have very different roles, but one thing that I picked up along the way is that anything you put on the Internet should in your mind be prefaced with “dear future employer.” I completely agree with the last commenter: not to post anything that you wouldn’t say in person. The Internet, typing something on a screen, has made it seem that we are anonymous even if we aren’t.
xo,
Suzi
I absolutely agree. Nothing inappropriate ought to be out there, and one ought to be careful about airing the laundry of one’s own congregation.
What I worry about is the notion that we should not be able to express an opinion. And that by doing so, we are somehow not allowing a trusting relationship to develop.
I can’t imagine saying to a couple who is dating, “You know, if you really want to build trust in your relationship, then never express an opinion.” We wouldn’t say that about two friends, about a mother and daughter, about almost any relationship. So why would we think that it would work in the church?
Andy, I was thinking about the Obama/Wright controversy when I was responding. Particularly, the coffee hour reactions that I heard here. The members of our congregation were laughing, saying, “Imagine if we were held responsible for what you two said in the pulpit?” They thought it was absurd that people imagined that sort of clergy/parishioner relationship.
That has certainly not been true in every church that I’ve been in though. It’s just been in this one.
Here is what I don’t get. Many of us have our sermons posted online. There is nothing I would say on a blog that I haven’t said in a sermon. So should I not be posting our sermons on our website?
Fact is, we will lose some jobs for what we say and believe. With my generation, we lost them for what we said from the pulpit. It looks like this generation is going to get hit for what you say in blogs (and sermons). Either way, as the song says, they can take those jobs and…well, give them to somebody who is going to say nothing offensive.
I’m in love with Andy (and his November 19 comment). I’ve wondered at the way Carol Merritt and all of you who comment are able to say pointed things but with love and grace. This is a great discussion. Thanks for all your input. Though I’m right-wing, slightly-fundamental but fully-evangelical, I hear your hearts and I cannot tell you how much I appreciate your love for the Lord and the church. I often disagree but I cannot tell you how much I appreciate your candor. Keep up the good work. We need more of this…not less.
Trying to stir the pot a little bit, maybe the “correct” answer to “do you blog?” is “yes, have you read my blog?” or “so, what about my blog concerns you?”
Google Analytics tells me that my blogs get on the average about 4-6 hits per day. Most of them are repeat visitors. I am not widely read! Very few people even care if I blog.
The issue of blogging seems to be an excuse, not a reason. And if the congregation “knows how I think,” while complete context may be lacking, it can’t be a bad thing.
Paul’s sermon blog is at http://timelovesahero.blogspot.com
Paul’s general musing blod is at http://fatmaninthebathtub02.blogspot.com
“Paul’s general musing blod”
Sorry friends, never was a good speeler.
Pax
Carol,
This post and a request from LPTS teacher, Carolyn Caldwell, motivated this post, Why I Blog
I referred them to you!
Thanks for this discussion.
Excellent content and style…keep up the good work!
I’d like to echo Steve way back there in this comment thread: If congregations are going to worry about how a pastor’s blog reflects on their church, they might start by examining first how their own crappy, shabby, blinking text, tiled background, 300 foot long (one page), non-standards compliant, zero design websites reflect on them and the larger church.
When I went before my CPM (forget applying to be a minister–I was just applying to be allowed to “inquire” into the *possibility* of going into ministry) my blog was raised as an issue and potential conflict (which I’ll readily admit it is). Since then, I’ve taken to putting disclaimers on controversial posts, addressed specifically to my CPM. Maybe we need a standard disclaimer that allows us to disposses words that are spoken when simply “thinking out loud.” Kind of like the EULA you have to check in agreement to before installing any proprietary software
“I certify that by the act of reading this blog post, I hereby also promise not to use it against the author in future employment proceedings. Should I decline to agree with this statement, I understand I my browser will be immediately redirected to a full online edition of Calvin’s Institutes, which I am far less likely to find objectionable content…” (and even if I do, he’s dead, so it’s not likely we’ll be hiring him anytime soon).
I’m chiming in late as usual…but my thought is that there is actually something to be said for moderating yourself. And maybe blogging is a medium to help one with that particular spiritual discipline.
I had something I would have LOVED to have blogged about this week as a result of a conversation at a meeting. But I couldn’t think of a way to do it without risking the possibility of embarrassing someone in particular (who probably would never read what I wrote anyway, but word does travel…)
I’m all for being honest when blogging and for challenging people’s thinking with what I say, but there are many points where discretion is simply advised…if you can’t do it while blogging you’re probably even worse at exercising it in real life.
I find blogging a great medium for thinking through exactly how I might go about challenging people with particular issues. And for developing a practice of discernment on those matters.
BTW: I think Carol models that well here.